Friday, March 15, 2013

Respite, giggles and more messy medical stuff

It's been a long time since Smiley was in respite, and the last overnight ended in tears, lots of them.  But my social worker did not give up and by Christmas she had another plan.  A small respite house  in a country village where just a handful of children stay over together with a few who live there, and no agency workers, so Smiley could get to know the staff.  This sounded good and the first meeting left me feeling confident.  Smiley was relaxed and interested, so I booked her in for two sessions of afternoon respite to familiarise her.  The first time I went to collect her she was looking a bit worried and then gave a big smile when she saw me.  The second time she looked as though she wanted to stay.  And last night, she did.

The day before I wobbled, especially at bedtime when she just looked so happy!


There was lots of preparation, including a special social story with pictures, which the school and I used to prepare her for her 'sleepover'.  On the morning there was no time for anything except packing and list checking.  And then she was gone.

My day was very productive, starting with a visit to the surgery to get a stitch taken out.  But while I was there the nurse took a look at my chart and said:

"You're due a smear, will I do it now?"

What?

Panic time...

Brain went through rapid checklist:

Shower: yes
Clean undies: yes
Wax/shave: no

Eeek!

But after a week of embarrassing and awkward medical procedures, surely I could cope with one more?

So I let her.  And hopefully there will no more poking and prodding and scraping and cutting this side of Christmas.

Rather stupidly I filled the rest of the day with shopping - the boring kind - administration and work.  I did rent a DVD for the evening, but my son kept asking me to turn it down and the soft Scottish accents of the characters meant I couldn't hear half the story!  I missed Smiley, especially in the quiet of the kitchen, so perhaps staying home and doing chores is not the best use of free time.

Memo to self: next time Smiley is in Respite DO SOMETHING FUN.

The highlight of the day was a call at about 8pm from the Respite House.  Nothing was wrong, they were just ringing to tell me how she was getting on!  A second call in the morning confirmed that all went pretty well.  No tears, just lots of excited giggling, which was non-stop from 4.30am in the morning!

She arrived back to school happy, and there was more laughter this afternoon when we went for a walk, after a treat of mashed up banana muffins and custard.  So I'm almost afraid to jinx it but it looks like this new respite house is a complete success :D

My son also benefited. I slept in till almost 7.  My son got up at the same time.  By choice.  And only made me wait for about 5 minutes while he did his 'stretches'.

I do wonder if some of his 'difficult' behaviour is due to jealousy of his sister and how much time and attention she needs from me.  So perhaps more respite for Smiley could improve my relationship with him too?

Wouldn't that be wonderful.



23 comments:

  1. They tell you that Respite is for "everyone" meaning that other family members may need it more than you. Whereas you feel like you have had a limb removed, other family members play their youtube clips at full volume and giggle all night.

    Long may the permanent staff last and that you and Smiley get the respite you need. xx

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    1. It looks as though I've found somewhere good at last :) xx

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  2. Sooo pleased all went well in the respite xxx

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  3. Delighted to hear Smiley was so happy in the new respite house, brilliant!
    Also great news on the young man.
    Even better news on sleeping in till 7 :)
    xxx Vicki

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    1. Ah yes, the sleeping in, that really was a treat :) xxx

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  4. That is so fab to hear (even if you did feel wobbly). It's an interesting insight that it may benefit your son as much as yourself and Smiley. Time will tell, eh? The respite home sounds great, which is a huge relief when we hear nothing but sensational bad stuff about them in the news. Beautiful picture of your gorgeous girl too XXX

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    1. Yep, my son does prefer it when he only has to share me with his eldest sister xxx

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  5. (Just lost my comment is cyberspace. Feck. Sorry if I'm repeating myself)
    I'm so happy to hear that all went well, even if you did feel a bit emotional. I'm fascinated that your son seems to be benefitting as well....that's something I never considered about respite.
    I love the picture of your beautiful girl as well XXX

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    1. I have comments moderation on due to bot attacks, so your first comment wasn't lost, just waiting to be approved, sorry xxx

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  6. Wow, great news. I really admire the social worker (and you!) for not giving up and Smiley is very smiley!

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  7. Great to hear that the respite break went well. I am a tiny bit jealous that you have such an amazing option. It must be a relief for you that Smiley was happy during her time there. What a bonus. I am sure that the opportunity to have some time with your boy was well worth it... and will work wonders with your relationship with him.

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    1. I hope you manage to find/arrange something too x

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  8. so delighted to hear this
    Respite is essential
    your daughter is so lovely

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    1. It is, especially when your child is older x

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  9. Glad the respite went well.
    And take time next time to do something for YOU.
    Peter going off on Wednesday - I can't wait!!!

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    1. Wish I could bring this family to you - they are sooooo good. Live on a smallholding in Ayrshire, have geese, horses, a pig, a cat, 2 dogs and ta da - A LOG FIRE!!!!
      Peter is just about packed and we'll be there tomorrow!

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  10. So happy o read this post. I love it that Smiley was giggling in the night and that you had a good night's sleep. xxx

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    1. They thought she was so cute in respite xxx

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