She bit me

It probably happened more than once when she was little.  And yes, it will happen if you stick your fingers in her mouth.   But now she's 17, and this was an unpleasant surprise, and a little dangerous, as it was mid hoist.  Now I don't think that she was biting me.  She was biting something red and attractive - my T-shirt!  But it had the same effect.  I jumped and cursed.  It was so unexpected, as Smiley is generally affectionate and loving and happy.

It's nothing serious, just a bit of swelling and bruising and couple of puncture marks.

She didn't mean it, she was just biting, she wasn't trying to hurt me.  But it did hurt me, both physically and also emotionally, because it's upsetting when you get hurt by someone you love.  Even in a small way.

It made me think, once again, of all the other people who get hurt by those in their care.  Some may be caring for partners with dementia, some may be caring for children with special needs.  Some of them are my friends.

I'm learning to be more tolerant of the person doing the hurting.  Sometimes it's unintentional, sometimes it's due to overwhelming emotions, often there is no malice involved.  But there is still hurt, on both sides.  And there's still a need to look after the person who gets hurt.

I know that my loving daughter did not mean to hurt me.  But my first thought was "She bit me!  How could she?"





10 comments:

  1. Oh dear I am so sorry. I hope you are over the shock and both types of hurt. You named Smiley well, I hope tomorrow you replace this memory with plenty smiles. Again, so sorry this happened, I hope it hasn't upset you too much. You know all the arguments as to why it happened but I can really understand why you would be thrown by it. xx

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    1. Lots of smiles today thank you :) I think she's forgotten she ever did it xx

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  2. Ouch!
    My children bite sometimes too, mostly, as you say, when they are overcome with emotion. It is not pleasant - but they are not 17 so I imagine your bite was rather painful! I hope you feel better soon x

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    1. It only hurt for a short while thank goodness! x

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  3. Puncture marks! I wasn't expecting you to say that! I imagined just a sort of nip. You poor thing. But I'm glad you wrote about this, because it is the sort of thing that's not often talked about. And anything that's not talked about becomes slightly shameful and hidden and another barrier to understanding.

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    1. That's true - and I think it's easier to say it about a severely disabled child perhaps too x

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  4. Oh no - you okay? Bet you were shook up. Hope she has more than made up for it since then with her lovely ways x

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  5. Oh no !! . It is a shock when the kids hurt us isn't it ?, I hope that everything is back to normal and you no longer hurt xx

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    1. I'm fine now, and no biting since either :) xx

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