If this sounds like you, then why not join Kate on Thin Ice for her Striking Mums club. You don't need to be a blogger, you just need to want to feel better about yourself and your life. Which I do.
To take part, Kate throws out a few questions each week:
|Striking Mums questions for the week beginning 25.1.15|
1. When I was young I was too busy to have hopes and dreams. They were for other people. I just wanted to party and do anything else that gave me an adrenaline rush, from driving fast cars to jumping out of planes. I never stopped, at least in my memory: I hated staying in, I always wanted to be out somewhere, whether that was the pub, Wimbledon, the cinema, running on the hills, or just wandering around the streets of London. "Live fast, die young" was the motto I adopted, and I was as surprised as anyone else to find myself still alive aged 30. Not just that, but I was married with my first child on the way.
If I met that crazy young wan now, she would probably not recognise me at all and would look at my life with horror. Many older people say they still feel the same as they did at 21. I certainly don't. Not that I regret those years, they make me smile looking back at all the memories. And they are a reminder that the old me is in there buried deep, and sometimes I need to bring her out, dust her down and have some fun.
2. I grab time for myself wherever I can. Feeling guilty about it is still a problem. Because I'm a 24/7 carer, I feel I should be working 24/7, which is obviously nonsense, but I still can't entirely escape the feeling that I am cheating my children when I do something for myself. It's not too hard to squeeze in some 'me' time if the teenagers go to school or their big sister is here to babysit, but it could get more difficult if she leaves home this summer. I'm determined to find alternative help, if only there weren't so many other things that needed organising and sorting out, like the nappies that didn't arrive yesterday, and the shower that broke last night. Not to mention the weekly autism course that I am attending.
3. I'm actually happier with my looks now I'm older: once you don't want to see me in a bikini. My hair is okay a lot of the time, my skin is good, and I'm only slightly overweight. I'm over 50, so no-one cares anyway, apart from my children, and they are happy so long as I don't make any radical changes. Or worse, embarrass them.
4. My goals for 2015? Well I wrote about them already. I'm making progress with them all, with the last one proving oddly easy to manage...